24 Jack Bauer Fakts..
Posted: Wed Mar 08, 2006 12:05 am
24 Jack Bauer facts
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* You can lead a horse to water. Jack Bauer can make him drink.
* If Jack Bauer was in a room with Hitler, Stalin, and Nina Meyers, and he had a gun with 2 bullets, he'd shoot Nina twice.
* If you wake up in the morning, it's because Jack Bauer spared your life.
* Upon hearing that he was played by Kiefer Sutherland, Jack Bauer killed Sutherland. Jack Bauer gets played by no man.
* Osama bin Laden's recent proposal for truce is a direct result of him finding out that Jack Bauer is, in fact, still alive.
* Jack Bauer once forgot where he put his keys. He then spent the next half-hour torturing himself until he gave up the location of the keys.
* Jack Bauer was never addicted to heroin. Heroin was addicted to Jack Bauer.
* 1.6 billion Chinese are angry with Jack Bauer. Sounds like a fair fight.
* Jack Bauer killed 93 people in just 4 days. Wait, that is a real fact.
* Jack Bauer doesn't miss. If he didn't hit you it's because he was shooting at another terrorist twelve miles away.
* Jack Bauer let the dogs out.
* Superman wears Jack Bauer pyjamas.
* Jack Bauer's favorite color is severe terror alert red. His second favorite color is violet, but just because it sounds like violent.
* If Jack and MacGyver were locked in a room together, Jack would make a bomb out of MacGyver and get out.
* Jack Bauer played Russian Roulette with a fully loaded gun and won.
* Lets get one thing straight, the only reason you are conscious right now is because Jack Bauer does not feel like carrying you.
* Jack Bauer got Hellen Keller to talk.
* When life gave Jack Bauer lemons, he used them to kill terrorists. Jack Bauer f'cking hates lemonade.
* When you open a can of whoop
* ass, Jack Bauer jumps out.
* Killing Jack Bauer doesn't make him dead. It just makes him angry.
* The quickest way to a man's heart is through Jack Bauer's gun.
* Jack Bauer can get McDonald's breakfast after 10:30.
* Cancer is not the leading cause of death in Middle Eastern men. It's Jack Bauer
* People with amnesia still remember Jack Bauer.
* It would only take 1 bullet for Jack Bauer to kill 50 Cent.
* Jack Bauer once won a game of Connect 4 in 3 moves.
* Jack Bauer has been to Mars. That's why theres no life on Mars.
* When the boogie man goes to sleep, he checks his closet for Jack Bauer
* Simon Says should be renamed to Jack Bauer Says because if Jack Bauer says something then you better f'*****g do it
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Previous Item »
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* You can lead a horse to water. Jack Bauer can make him drink.
* If Jack Bauer was in a room with Hitler, Stalin, and Nina Meyers, and he had a gun with 2 bullets, he'd shoot Nina twice.
* If you wake up in the morning, it's because Jack Bauer spared your life.
* Upon hearing that he was played by Kiefer Sutherland, Jack Bauer killed Sutherland. Jack Bauer gets played by no man.
* Osama bin Laden's recent proposal for truce is a direct result of him finding out that Jack Bauer is, in fact, still alive.
* Jack Bauer once forgot where he put his keys. He then spent the next half-hour torturing himself until he gave up the location of the keys.
* Jack Bauer was never addicted to heroin. Heroin was addicted to Jack Bauer.
* 1.6 billion Chinese are angry with Jack Bauer. Sounds like a fair fight.
* Jack Bauer killed 93 people in just 4 days. Wait, that is a real fact.
* Jack Bauer doesn't miss. If he didn't hit you it's because he was shooting at another terrorist twelve miles away.
* Jack Bauer let the dogs out.
* Superman wears Jack Bauer pyjamas.
* Jack Bauer's favorite color is severe terror alert red. His second favorite color is violet, but just because it sounds like violent.
* If Jack and MacGyver were locked in a room together, Jack would make a bomb out of MacGyver and get out.
* Jack Bauer played Russian Roulette with a fully loaded gun and won.
* Lets get one thing straight, the only reason you are conscious right now is because Jack Bauer does not feel like carrying you.
* Jack Bauer got Hellen Keller to talk.
* When life gave Jack Bauer lemons, he used them to kill terrorists. Jack Bauer f'cking hates lemonade.
* When you open a can of whoop
* ass, Jack Bauer jumps out.
* Killing Jack Bauer doesn't make him dead. It just makes him angry.
* The quickest way to a man's heart is through Jack Bauer's gun.
* Jack Bauer can get McDonald's breakfast after 10:30.
* Cancer is not the leading cause of death in Middle Eastern men. It's Jack Bauer
* People with amnesia still remember Jack Bauer.
* It would only take 1 bullet for Jack Bauer to kill 50 Cent.
* Jack Bauer once won a game of Connect 4 in 3 moves.
* Jack Bauer has been to Mars. That's why theres no life on Mars.
* When the boogie man goes to sleep, he checks his closet for Jack Bauer
* Simon Says should be renamed to Jack Bauer Says because if Jack Bauer says something then you better f'*****g do it